Today I started a diet.
It's a very big deal because I don't diet.
When I was a child my Grandmother used to say, "You can eat as much as you want because you are so skinny." And I was....When I was 12!
Every decade packs on another size. When I go shopping I see so many cute clothes in gorgeous colors. Size 0 to 10. I never knew that I would be exploring the plus size clothing department. Yuck! It's not that I don't like myself...I do like ME. It's that I don't like looking at myself in family photos or my car reflection as I walk out of Starbuck's with a croissant.
I have confidence and I like to dress up. But, I notice that people do treat me differently. They're not mean, they just treat me like white trash. I'm in the way in isles. When I fling my purse over my shoulder, it usually hits a person or knocks something off of a shelf. I've perfected, "Oh, I'm so sorry I knocked your child over." It's depressing.
I remember, not too long ago, being able to breathe easily while tying my shoes. Now it's a struggle because my belly is in the way. How'd that get there?
I've always been athletic and in good shape no matter my size. But, my feet hurt now after standing all day. They go through a workout carrying me from place to place each day.
I find the pretty plus size clothes. They make some cute ones now. Even the big designers are in on it now. But, I want the casual, beautiful, colorful clothes that all of hip Los Angeles wears. Unfortunately, they haven't made those into plus sizes yet.
So...This diet....Is not going well.
I am trying to eat only one sweet thing a day.
With 5 kids, no sleep, and a tight budget, sugar is my energy bar. I eat to get through each day. Chocolate is a big part of that day.
One sweet a day will mean that I will be forced to eat fruits and veggies all day instead of chocolate or chai teas.
It's all Starbuck's fault. Before I went to Starbuck's, I was losing weight naturally. Now, I crave something from Starbuck's every day. There's a reason they don't post calories in coffee shops. One chai is equal to a meal!~ And I always want a meal after my chai.
Well...I'll try. We'll see how successful I am. I just wish I could eat whatever I wanted whenever I wanted, like my Grandmother said.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Dang, did we ever have different grandmothers! My grandma poked at every extra pound on me and warned me of a life of disrespect and disgrace. And I know what you mean! They formulate those drinks to make us crave more. they make it easy and appealing. They create an atmosphere that suggests that smart, cool people consume these things. they have the whole sales pitch down so well that we don't even notice how well they have our numbers!
ReplyDeleteYeah, people DO treat you differently when you are tubby! For one thing, you can walk down Sunset Blvd with no Johns yelling "How much?" Before I gained weight, I could walk with curlers in my hair in my army pants and they still thought I was workin'. So I won't say being build like a potato does not have a payoff - it scares away unwanted attention. It scares off most attention. It is safe. Great blog as usual.
This is happening to me, too. And I have noticed that people take me more seriously. Maybe because I'm in my fifties now.
ReplyDeleteAt first, I thought the extra pounds were temporary. I blame Little Debbie's Nutty Bars. And the fact that I just posted a blog in praise of chili dogs.
I found cute clothes at Avenue. Do they have stores in your area?
I don't know... I never get out to shop.
ReplyDeleteUnless it's at a mall, I'm clueless.